衛生署長楊志良的"單身精神病說" @ julie & frank 的部落格

"今天，兩件事發生: 我的四十歲開始，以及我的抗拒結束。"

二代健保被批懲罰單身貴族，衛生署長楊志良的"單身精神病說" 讓很多人不以為然。以下很有幽默感的一段小文是朋友很久以前寄來的，我把中文翻譯稍微修飾了一下，最後一句很嗆喔。博君一笑。

為什麼越來越多女人單身不婚 ?

這是美國CBS 60 Minutes (六十分鐘 )主持人Andy Rooney對40歲以上的女人的看法:

As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all.
隨著年齡增長, 我越來越珍惜40歲以上的女人

Here are just a few reasons why:
為什麼呢?

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask,

"What are you thinking?"

40歲以上的女人不會在半夜把你吵醒, 然後問你:
“你在想什麼?”

She doesn't care what you think.
她才不在乎你想什麼。

If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game,
40歲以上的女人如果不想看球賽

she doesn't sit around whining about it.
她不會坐在你旁邊抱怨東抱怨西

She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.
她會去做她想做的、更有趣的事情

Women over 40 are dignified.
40歲以上的女人穩重自持

They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera

or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.
她們很少在歌劇院或高級餐廳裡跟你大呼小叫。

Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you
if they think they can get away with it.

當然，如果你罪有應得，她們將毫無遲疑地
一槍把你給斃了，如果她們想她們可以逃避得了責罰。

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved.
熟女不吝於讚美 (不管是不是實至名歸)

They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
因為她們知道不被欣賞是甚麼樣的滋味

Women get psychic as they age.

女人越老越通靈

You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.
你永遠不需要向40歲以上的女人懺悔

Once you get past a wrinkle or two,
只要能夠對皺紋視而不見

a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
40歲以上的女人遠比年輕美眉性感

Older women are forthright and honest.
熟女直截了當又誠實

They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one.
如果你是蠢蛋，她會馬上叫你滾蛋

You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
你完全不需要傷腦筋揣摩她的心意

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons.
是得，為了很多理由，我們讚揚40歲以上的女人。

Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal.
很不幸地，40歲以上的男人並不對等。

For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40,
相對於每一個絕色、聰明、迷人的40歲以上的女人

there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants
就有一個禿頭凸肚穿著黃色長褲的熟男

making a fool of himself with some 20-year old waitress.
出洋相地跟20歲的服務生美眉調情

Ladies, I apologize.
女士們，我道歉。

For all those men who say,
為那些說:

"Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?",
“如果能有免費的牛奶喝，為什麼要買頭母牛回家” 的男人們，

here's an update for you.

這裡提供你們最新信息:

Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage.
現在有80%的女人寧願單身不婚

Why?
為什麼呢?

Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!
因為她們明白不值得為了一根小香腸買整隻豬!